


Once I was...

by flywithturtles (greenet)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Growing Up, Light Angst, Mostly Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-16
Updated: 2016-07-16
Packaged: 2018-07-24 10:34:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,862
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7504918
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/greenet/pseuds/flywithturtles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tobio is four. His best friends are Kenya and Handa. Not because they have that much in common, but because they live close to each other and their mothers are friendly enough arrange play dates. Kenya likes running around and climbing anything that can be climbed. Tobio likes following him around and telling him that he’s going to fall down. Handa likes laughing when Kenya inevitably does fall and then running to find an adult while gleefully calling out that “Kenya fell again!”</p><p>-<br/>Kageyama and the friendships he forms as he grows up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Once I was...

**Author's Note:**

  * For [icespyders](https://archiveofourown.org/users/icespyders/gifts).



> I listened to _7 Years_ by Lukas Graham a lot at work while writing this and this was the result. I couldn't quite manage "Kageyama chooses between identical volleyball shoes" but I hope you like it anyway! There's a tiny bit of angst because Kageyama is an awkward bunny, but I was aiming for the reader to be left with warm fuzzies and I hope I succeeded at that!

Tobio is four. His best friends are Kenya and Handa. Not because they have that much in common, but because they live close to each other and their mothers are friendly enough arrange play dates. Kenya likes running around and climbing anything that can be climbed. Tobio likes following him around and telling him that he’s going to fall down. Handa likes laughing when Kenya inevitably does fall and then running to find an adult while gleefully calling out that “Kenya fell again!”

Tobio folds his arms over his chest and grumbles. Handa laughs at him too. Handa is always laughing. 

Handa gets a ball for his fourth birthday, and then it’s the only thing he wants to play with it. Tobio is fine with it, can play catch or kick it for hours. Kenya gets bored sooner and vanishes up a tree, or up a climbing tower, or up on the wall, but he still hangs around and yells encouraging words to Handa some times and Tobio other times. 

Tobio is happy.

* * *

Tobio is seven. Kenya moved to a different town when he was five, but Handa still talks to him sometimes, even if they aren’t very close. Usually when they’re playing ball games, even though Tobio is bossy. He knows he is, because even the teachers say that. Sometimes they laugh when they say it, and Tobio blushes and feels stupid and like a kid. Sometimes they’re frowning and there’s something unpleasant in their voices. Tobio isn’t sure how to deal with that so he doesn’t. 

He’s good at memorization and gets impatient when Aiko messes up the rhythm in their word game again, cutting the game short before Kageyama gets a chance to demonstrate how good he is. “No!” he says sharply. “That’s not right. It’s green boat then red apples, get it right!” 

Aiko blinks at him and then bursts into tears.

Everybody likes Aiko so everybody glares at him, even Handa. She’s cute and sweet and friendly, always has a smile to everyone. Tobio is not and doesn’t really smile for no reason. He doesn’t understand why he should.

Tobio glares back defiantly. He’s right and Aiko was wrong. What’s so hard to understand about that?

“You should be nicer,” his mom says later. “You’re not going to make friends if you’re not nice to the other kids.” 

Tobio frowns. “I’m nice,” he protests. “But Aiko should do it _right_.” 

“It’s a game. Aiko just lost,” mom says patiently. 

Tobio looks down. “I wanted to play too. It’s a funny game,” he says quietly. “I’m good at it.” 

Mom is quiet. “Oh Tobio.”

* * *

Tobio is eleven, and he likes playing volleyball. He’s not on a real team, but he plays with the kids at the volleyball school. Echizen is really good, but not as good as Tobio. He tells her that and she hits him. Afterwards she shares an ice-cream with him, so it’s probably okay. 

Echizen hits him a lot and when Tobio starts yelling, she yells back. Tobio likes Echizen. She’s sort of a friend, even if they only meet at volleyball club. 

Then Nakamura joins the club, and Echizen starts acting weird. She has cute things in her hair, and she blushes, and she doesn’t yell back at Tobio when Nakamura is around, she just rolls her eyes and _sighs_. “You’re so stupid, Kageyama,” she says. 

Tobio doesn’t understand it. His father laughs when he complains about it. “You’ll understand when you’re older,” he says, amused. 

Tobio doesn’t want to understand; he wants to play volleyball.

* * *

Tobio is thirteen, and Kunimi is glaring at him because he made Kindaichi cry again. He doesn’t mean to! He just gets frustrated and then he yells. Kindaichi doesn’t have to take it so personally — except he _should_ , because he should be _better_. But Kindaichi doesn’t listen, he doesn’t understand, and neither does Kunimi, for all that both of them are the closest to friends Tobio has right now. 

He just wants to be the best. Is that so wrong?

Tobio frowns, arms crossed protectively over his chest. “I just think—“ 

“Shut up, King,” Kunimi says sharply, cutting him off. “We all know what you _think_. You’re not the only person on this team, you know.”

“I know that!” 

“Do you really?” Kunimi gives him a final contemptuous look and then leaves him alone on the locker room.

Tobio doesn’t know what to do. 

Whenever he tries to talk to Kindaichi, his words always come out wrong. He practices in the mirror a couple of times, staring at his own eyes, tries to see what Kindaichi sees. But he just sees his own face. There’s nothing particularly intimidating about it. It’s just a face. He’d tried practicing in the mirror before back when he tried to talk to Oikawa. It hadn’t worked then either. No matter how respectful he was, no matter how he phrased it, Oikawa just made fun of him. It made Tobio want to try harder — if he beat Oikawa, he’d have to notice him. Maybe teach him? Talk to him at least. 

But he doesn’t respect Kindaichi and Kunimi the same way. They’re not as good as Oikawa is. And Tobio can’t fake anything — he’s never been able to. He doesn’t look down on them either, though he understands that that’s maybe the impression he gives. But he doesn’t. He just wants them to be as good as he is. To care as much as he does. But they don’t.

* * *

Tobio is fifteen and he has a team. A real team where he sort of fits in, and it’s strange but nice. Tobio wants to toss for Asahi but pinning the Ace down for a practice session is not easy. Asahi seems a little nervous around Tobio, and Tobio doesn’t understand why. It’s a little like with Kindaichi, except Asahi seems to like him well enough. Anyway, his opponents on the court should be afraid of him, because he’s a very good setter, but his own team shouldn’t be. Tobio wants to be liked by the players on the Karasuno team. It’s a little weird. He’s never cared much about being liked before. He’s never tried this hard to _be_ liked before.

Some of it is Hinata, definitely. Hinata is simultaneously the world’s most annoying person and the most amazing. It shouldn’t be possible, but Hinata manages it easily. Everything seems possible when Hinata is with him. 

But it’s also Tanaka and Sugawara, especially. Tanaka, for all that he’s impulsive and hot headed, is a good senpai. In a weird way, he reminds Tobio a little of Iwaizumi, except Tanaka pays way more attention to Tobio than Iwaizumi ever did. Sugawara doesn’t remind him of Oikawa at all. And Sugawara doesn’t hate him. Tobio would understand it if he did, because Tobio took his spot on the team, and he’s the better setter too. 

(He never understood why Oikawa didn’t like him because Oikawa was always better than him.)

But Sugawara really doesn’t hate him. 

“Can I ask you for a favor?” Tobio asks Sugawara, bowing, too eager, too awkward as always. 

Sugawara blinks at him. “Sure? What is it?” 

Tobio has to cut off his automatic ‘please, senpai!’ follow up and coughs. Sugawara waits patiently while Tobio clears his throat. “I, um, was wondering if you’d stay behind and practice with me and Asahi? Maybe today? If today is good?” 

Sugawara looks towards Asahi who is spinning the ball at the tip of his finger, holding it raised above his head. Asahi bursts into delighted laughter when Hinata comes running, jumps and swipes the ball in Tanaka’s direction. Tanaka sends it towards Noya. Noya passes it in Tsukishima’s direction. Tsukishima takes one small step to the right, apparently deep in conversation with Yachi, and the ball slams into the wall behind him. Yachi squeaks and jumps. Tsukishima looks unimpressed as always. Sugawara grins and turns back to Tobio, nodding. “Sure, sounds like fun.”

* * *

Tobio is twenty. He tosses the ball for Hinata who always, always jumps. They’re used to winning, but that doesn’t mean they always do. 

This time they do though, and Tobio is grinning when he leaves the gym, bag slung over his shoulder. 

“Kageyama?” A low voice halts him in his path and he turns. 

It takes a moment before recognition sets in. “Handa?” 

“Wow, it’s been a lifetime,” Handa says, laughing. “You look like… you. Just. More so.” 

Handa’s hair is close cropped, and he has three studs in both ears. He’s wearing torn jean shorts and a t-shirt with an anime character on it. He does not look like himself. Tobio still recognizes him though. His eyes are the same, but with laugh lines starting to come in at the corners, and his laughter is the same, too, just deeper. Older. “You too,” Tobio says. 

“Do you go to school here too?”

Tobio nods. “I’m on the volleyball team.”

“You always did like ball games. I remember when we were little.” There’s something strangely wistful about Handa now. Handa smiles again. “Anyway. Good seeing you again.”

Hinata comes running out of the gym. “Kageyama! Wait for me! I want ramen!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Tobio says, half turning towards him. It’s a little weird having Hinata see Handa and vice versa. Like two parts of his life that was never meant to meet colliding. 

Tobio isn’t particularly sentimental about anything or anybody, but he finds himself feeling oddly fond of the kids he and Handa had been. Maybe it is the same wistfulness he sees in Handa. 

Hinata gives them both a curious look, hitching his bag firmer onto his narrow shoulders. 

“Hinata, this is Handa. We used to live sort of next door when we were kids. Hinata’s my Ace,” Tobio explains to Handa. “We’re on the team together.”

“And you promised me food,” Hinata reminds him. 

Tobio nods. He gives Handa an awkward look, not sure how to leave this encounter gracefully. Five years ago he wouldn’t have cared, but now he does. He blames Hinata. 

But Handa is looking down at his wristwatch, and is starting to walk off. “Shit, I’m late for my lecture. But it was nice seeing you again! We should catch up!”

Tobio has no intention of catching up but he nods anyway. “Yeah. Uh. Bye.” He waves hesitantly when Handa does. He is really never going to be as effortlessly social as Hinata is, but he thinks this went… okay? Maybe?

Hinata grins up at him. “So. Ramen?”

Tobio nods. “Yeah, yeah. But we’re going to the place I like. You know, next to the Daiso and the Korean BBQ.”

“What? No! My place is so much better!” Hinata whines, but he follows Tobio anyway, like Tobio knew he would.

Hinata is a good friend. The thought isn’t even strange anymore, it is just a fact of Tobio's life: Volleyball is great, and Hinata is a good friend. He’s suddenly filled with affection towards Hinata and surprises him with a grin and an offer to pay for his drink, and Hinata blinks at him and then beams happily. 

“Kageyama is the best!”


End file.
